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Lightbulb Jokes
How many Dianic women does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
That's W-I-M-M-I-N, and that's not funny!
How many Dianics does it take to change a light bulb?
15 -- One to change the light bulb, one to prepare the environmental impact statement,
and the rest to do a self-criticism afterwards...
How many years does it take a Dianic Wiccan to change a lightbulb?
You can change it whenever you are empowered to do so.
How many years does it take a Dianic Wiccan to change a lightbulb?
Not sure... We'll call Z. Bhudapest and get back to you!
How many Druids does it take to change a lightbulb?
501. One to change the bulb and 500 to align the new stone.
How many Druids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
They don't screw in lightbulbs, they screw in Stone Circles.
How many Druids does it take to change a lightbulb?
Thirteen: one to hold the bulb and 12 to drink enough to make the room spin.
How many years does it take a Druid to change a lightbulb?
21, unless you're Irish.
How many Family traditionalists does it take to change a light bulb?
Candle light was good enough for our ancestors, it's good enough for us!
How many Family traditionalists does it take to change a light bulb?
Ask your OWN grandmother!
How many British Traditional Witches does it take to change a light bulb?
13. One to change the bulb, and 12 to mourn the passing of the old bulb.
How many Gardnerians does it take to change a light bulb?
It's a third degree secret.
How many years does it take a Gardnerian to change a light bulb?
A year and A day in an Outer Grove, a year and a day at first level, a year and a day
at second level, but only third levels change light bulbs.
How many Alexandrians does it take to change a light bulb?
"Lets go see how the Gardnerians do it!"
How many years does it take an Alexandrian to change a light bulb?
That's the Maiden's Job. Maiden - Make it so.
How many solitary Witches does it take to change a light bulb?
Duh!
How many years does it take for a solitary Witch to change a light bulb?
How long does it take to get one out of the closet?
How many years does it take a Kitchen Witch to change a light bulb?
Already changed.
How many Frost "School of Wicca" Witches does it take to change a light bulb?
"Just you! That's right, YOU! And for only $195 we'll send you our complete
"Witches Magic Power of Light Bulb Changing Course" with real knowledge that you
can apply this to ANY light bulb ANYwhere! Listen to the testimony of a young couple from
Wisconsin who..."
How many Discordians does it take to change a light bulb?
"How many have we got?"
How many Discordians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Five Tons.
How many Discordians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A blue fish Tuesday.
How many Discordians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
2. One to hold a ladder and one to fill the bathtub with brightly colored German
machine tools.
How many Wiccans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Four. One for each direction.
How many Buckland Witches does it take to change a light bulb?
"Refer to Practical Light Bulb Changing by Raymond Buckland..."
How many Pagans does it take to change a lightbulb?
Six. One to change it, and five to sit around complaining that lightbulbs never burned
out before those damned Christians came along.
How many Thelemites does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, Every One of them is a Star.
How many Witches does it take to change a light bulb?
What do you want it changed into?
How many Witches does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, they do it in Great Rites.
How many Golden Dawners does it take to change a light bulb?
One to hold the ladder, one to hold the bulb, three to decipher the Light Bulb Ritual
from the Secret Chiefs, one to publish it, and one to sue all the others.
How many Sex magicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
They don't screw in lightbulbs, they screw on the altar!
How many Sex magicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Only two, but they have to be very small!
How many Tantrics does it take to change a light bulb?
2 as long as the lamp is by the bed...
How many Ceremonial Magicians does it take to change a light bulb?
One. They hold it up, and the world revolves around them.
How many Kabbalists does it take to change a lightbulb?
261.
How many Aries does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but it takes a hell of a lot of light bulbs.
How many Tauruses does it take to change a light bulb?
What, me move?
How many Geminis does it take to change a light bulb?
Two.
How many Cancers does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one, but he has to bring his mother.
How many Leos does it take to change a light bulb?
A dozen. One to change the bulb, and eleven to applaud.
How many Virgos does it take to change a light bulb?
One to clean out the socket, one to dust the bulb, one to install, and two engineers to
check the work.
How many Libras does it take to change a light bulb?
Libras can't decide if the bulb needs to be changed.
How many Scorpios does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They LIKE the dark.
How many Sagittarians does it take to change a light bulb?
One to install the bulb, and a Virgo to pick up the pieces.
How many Capricorns does it take to change a light bulb?
The light's fine as it is.
How many Aquarians does it take to change a light bulb?
Have you asked the bulb if it WANTS to be changed?
How many Pisceans does it take to change a light bulb?
What light bulb?
How many astrologers does it take to change a light bulb?
"Don't ask me now, Mercury's retrograde!"
How many New-Agers does it take to change a light bulb?
Five. One to change it and four to share the experience!
How many New-Agers does it take to change a light bulb?
"We don't use light bulbs, we just think happy thoughts at our quartz crystals and
they glow."
How many years does it take for a New-Ager to change a light bulb?
Well, it takes many many years, unless you pay $650 US non-refundable, Visa or MC
accepted. Then you can do it after the weekend intensive training seminar.
How many New-Agers does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. They just join self-help groups to learn to live with darkness in their lives.
How many Odinists does it take to change a lightbulb?
21, one to hold the light bulb, 20 to drink till the world spins.
How many women with PMS does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One. ONE!! And do you know WHY it only takes ONE? Because no one else in this house
knows HOW to change a light bulb. They don't even know the bulb is BURNED OUT. They would
sit in this house in the dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it OUT. And once they
figured it out they wouldn't be able to find the light bulbs despite the fact that they've
been in the SAME CUPBOARD for the past SEVENTEEN YEARS. But if they did, by some miracle,
actually find the light bulbs, TWO DAYS LATER the chair that they dragged from two rooms
over to stand on to change the STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!! AND
UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE CRUMPLED WRAPPER THE STUPID @*!#$% LIGHT BULBS CAME IN! WHY?!
BECAUSE NO ONE IN THIS HOUSE EVER CARRIES OUT THE GARBAGE!! IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL
SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT ARE 12 FEET DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE.
THE HOUSE!! IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS... I'm sorry... what did you ask me?
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MY WITCH SHOP
